What seems to be happening is a predicament we've gotten ourselves into, don't you think?
Let's back-track ever so slightly.
Ok. So, you decided that you wanted to be somebody. Fantastic!
But you screwed it up. And you blame her.
You blame her for whatever happened that week. She left you in the dust because she couldn't get over her childish games.
The games that set the dominos tumbling...
You didn't know it at the time, right? Hey, at least your focus isn't suffering as it once did; when the most beautiful piece of artistry was in the palms of your hands. Before you found out her beauty was as dangerous as the knife she used to rip out your heartstrings, tying them in knots until you could no longer breathe.
Wait. You can't breathe. You sink deeper and deeper, with the weight of her emotional tidal wave dragging you down into the darkness that so many had warned you about.
The pressure of the water bared down on your shoulders as if Atlas himself traded spots with you.
Your mind is being twisted by the thoughts that swim between your ears in the night.
The stars that shine down remind you of jewels that were too precious to be put in the earth when light shone upon the seas.
He brushes past you, leaving a breeze in his wake.
His skin is sun-kissed. His hair is a deep, waved black. His eyes are a burning scarlet.
What? What is this feeling. I've felt it before. It's an unshakeable temptation.
Something so wrong that feels so right and exhilarating and wonderful. How is this bad? How could anyone ever think this feeling was Satan's taint?
Only God himself could bless this feeling upon a poor sinner boy.
This feeling is a flood that pours into the hole you thought you patched up and sealed. But the scar rips open, tearing away at the flesh of the starving animal.
You must tell people of this new and wondrous discovery!
Ha. Scoffed at. Big surprise, right? Then you realize that the entire time, savages kept you locked up behind golden walls and dungeon cells made of sapphire.
But you want more than one color. You want the shine of the stars too beautiful for earth, the stardust of rocks too exhilarated by adventure to settle down, and the beads of crystalized water that run down the face of the mountains.
Where are you?
This time's different, though. It's not dark.
You're flying. Straight at the stars. The colors become real.
They taste of salted caramel, chocolates, tarts, and creams.
You close your eyes...
Let go of the reins...
You let your hair scrape the sky behind you...
And you fall.
Your ears catch the sound of the rushing air. It rejoices as it races past you, cheering you on. There are fireworks exploding around you.
The earth blares the sound of mighty trumpets to celebrate the arrival of a lover. The royalty of drums accompanies the symphonies that ring across the nations.
You plummet at blinding speeds towards the surface. You take one last look at the unimaginable beauty that screams LIFE behind you. You look back at the surface, surely the impact will send you off?
Tears of pure joy glide down your cheeks.
Is that a smile I see?